I’m happy to answer questions about feminism, provided they’re true questions. Today I’m going to answer one of those, Do feminists hate men?
In the first place, I need to say that this question is biased. It’s not the right question to ask, so that is why feminists get angry about it. It’s a question that focuses on the individual person. Who knows what an individual person feels? And what does that matter when we are speaking of social movements that fight for justice and the end of violence?
The real question contains the answer: Has feminism suggested that men should be tortured, imprisoned, murdered for the violence they have exerted against women for centuries? And the answer is No. Does feminism say we have to do to men what men do to women in patriarchy? No. (Actually feminism is the most relevant nonviolent r-evolution I’ve ever known of.)
What feminism does is criticize/challenge the patriarchal notion of what a human being is.
Patriarchy established — most probably parting from patriarchal religions — that human beings need to be divided into two separate groups, groups created according to their genitals (penises and vaginas) as if genitals determined what a human mind can be. These two groups are Men and Women. Patriarchy cannot accept there might be other kinds of bodies, and it certainly cannot tolerate that we are all equal and different, that we all have HUMAN MINDS, where our thoughts and feelings are created. Patriarchal societies have established what a Man is and has to do, feel, think (his role in society), and what a woman is and has to do or feel (her role in society). Feminism has developed to fight this, and especially to protect the group that patriarchal societies consider inferior, because women in patriarchal societies are considered inferior intellectually, emotionally and spiritually, their only worth coming from a biological ability (if they have it), which is to have babies.
So what feminism fights is the NOTION OF MAN, not the people.
But because this is r-evolutionary, because this entails a great deep change for the better in human societies, we, a species taught to be self-destructive and destructive with others, need to despise it and destroy it. So we go along and say that Feminists are man-hater, irrationally, violently, because it is violent to lie, to spread misconceptions that destroy good things.
As a feminist, I know I’m sexist, and I’ve been fighting my sexism (machismo) for three decades now. I can say that I’m far less sexist than most human beings, but it’s been very hard work. Understanding a great idea doesn’t mean you can actually live up to it, and that’s why feminists are so self-critical and give a lot of importance to working not only to change unfair things in society but also ourselves. The personal is political is a feminist slogan which has radically changed our lives.
Thanks to this idea, The personal is political, today in Spain we have a Law against Gender Violence, this is, when I was a child, if a man beat up “his” wife, and you called the police, the police would say, “We can’t do anything, it’s a private matter.” But today the police can arrest the man, and the woman can seek protection.
Personally, I do hate some men, because they are so violent and irrational (read the first comment under this post, to see a fine example!). But my hate does not take the form of those men’s love: their love says they can humiliate, psychologically mistreat (despise), beat women up, rape them, murder them “when they deserve it.”